What Women Really Want For Mother’s Day

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A photo of mother and daughter embracing. Portrait of happy woman and girl with curly and frizzy hair. They are in casuals at home.

 

When someone had jokingly asked me last week, “So, what you even want for Mother’s Day?” There was no iota of doubt in my mind about what I wanted; a day free from all household and momma chores.

A day when I could wake up anytime that I liked, when I didn’t have someone demanding breakfast but instead being made breakfast for. Simply put, a day when every one of my children automatically knew what to do, and actually did those things, without waiting for me.

It’s an utopia world abi? What did I get instead?  A 5:30am wake up call, because as the week came to a close, I had developed a craving for jollof rice and moi moi. Unable to satisfy that craving on Saturday, due to my other cooking rendezvous, I declared it breakfast for Sunday. So, I had to wake up early to start cooking, and by the time I was done with cooking and doing other morning business, we were rushing to get to church, and I had yet to have that longed for breakfast.

Let’s just say, I had my desired breakfast for dinner. Between all of my running around, my still sleepy 8 year old daughter had wrapped her hands around me and wished me a happy Mother’s Day, my sister had called to wish me a happy mother’s day, I had called my mom, the women in my church had been celebrated and prayed for. So, it was basically just another Sunday but with the difference that, Happy Mother’s Day rented the air.

In the spirit of the day, I asked the mothers around me what they wanted for Mother’s Day, and their responses varied but there was a common thread; a break from taking care of others. I hope the men are reading and taking note. Your wife could do with a break now and then, mother’s day or not.

I spoke to Mrs A, who is mom of two girls, and there was no hesitation. “I just want a day that’s free of all my mom routines.  You know like, today, I have had to settle numerous quarrels over non issues. I didn’t know girls could fight like that, they are supposed to be best of pals but not my kids, and they always have something to disagree about! For mother’s day, I wanted to take the load off myself a bit, so I told them in advance and planned what I would like them to do, which involved them getting themselves cereal for breakfast, washing up after themselves, picking out their clothes and getting dressed by themselves, which was exactly what happened.

I told everyone in my house, that it was Mother’s Day and mom is off duty, while dad’s in charge. So, he settled all the quarrels, before and after church, which gave me plenty time to do my make up in peace and rest well after church. I only made dinner.”

Mrs BF, who is a pregnant mom of one said, “My husband was on a pampering spree oh and I just let him. Who doesn’t like better thing? Honestly, I didn’t have anything in mind for mother’s day, I didn’t even know Mother’s Day was coming. My husband told me about it on Friday, along with the instruction to provide him a grocery list, that he would be doing the shopping the next day. Mehn! I didn’t know where the energy came from, but I put that list together sharply. On Saturday morning, he took our daughter along for the shopping trip, and I had the whole house to myself.

You would think I would be busy around the house. Nothing of such happened! As soon as I let in the weekly cleaning lady, I went to the kitchen, got a drink and found my bed and the remote control…and that was where they met me, three hours later. My daughter was so tired, she slept off in the car and continued at home.

We sorted out the grocery together, started the cooking and finished it together. That was a first for me.

Today (Sunday), I’m yet to do a thing in this house, just looking pretty… I like this Mother’s Day and wish every day would be like it.”

Mrs P is a newly pregnant mom, who had been TTC for 6 years. She literally just discovered she’s pregnant and has been carrying herself like an egg. Who wouldn’t?  Her wish list for Mother’s day was simple, rest and a stocked fridge.

Her husband was all for it, but there was a threat to the pregnancy on Saturday night, so she spent the night and Mother’s Day in the hospital on strict bed rest.

She got her heart desire for the day, but not in the location she would have preferred…but it was definitely a lot better than not being pregnant. This was her first Mother’s Day celebration…being pregnant, and for that alone, she remains grateful to God.

For Mama H, she told me how all she wanted was just to sleep. “I think 8 hours of sleep is something that I would really like on that day. You see, my children are grown and can take care of themselves, dad and the house, but they are always asking me for one thing or the other, as though I’m the only one who lives in the house. So, if no one wakes up with one unnecessarily question on Sunday morning, it will be really welcome.”

When I called her, later yesterday, to wish her a happy Mother’s Day, and ask how the day went. Mama H had good news for me. She got the lie-in that she wanted; no one woke her up with a demand for where the knife was, or if they still had salt in the house (she actually said that, lol). Instead, she woke up to see her husband and boys tiptoeing into her bedroom with a breakfast tray and a card.

As soon as they placed the tray down and wished her a happy Mother’s Day, they all retreated and left her in peace. It was a rarity in her household, but welcome all the same. So, Mama H ate her specially prepared breakfast, bathed and headed for church with her family, who were all ready, by the time she stepped out of her bedroom.

Another surprise.

She told me how she hadn’t stepped a foot inside her kitchen all day, but feared what the next day (Monday) would bring, when she did.

Hopefully, their best behaviour would have extended to that area and they have cleaned up after themselves.

She noted that it felt eerie to see her boys and their dad like that, but a day off like that was very much welcome.

I agree. Why bother looking a gift horse in the mouth? It’s enough that everyone is on their best behaviour; the rest can sort itself out.

To all our mamas, who literally make the world go round, we hail you!

 

Join the conversation with any of our TTC and Pregnancy Groups here

 

Photo credits:

1. http://img.huffingtonpost.com/

2. http://thinkpynk.com/

3. il8.picdn.net

4. https://www.realsimple.com/

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