In a world where so many of my teenage friends were so well endowed in the chest region, and were even growing some more, my own boobs had stopped growing and I felt weird. In secondary school, I had swung between hating my small boobs and loving it.
I had really high hopes for my boobs as a teenager, considering I had hit puberty somewhat early and had expected some things to keep growing, the same way my height was just popping, but alas, as I hit 18, 19 and by 20 years old, I resigned to fate to it, and decided to enjoy my life with what I have got.
In between, I prayed that I would take after my aunt (my mom’s sister) or even my paternal grandmother (I heard she had boobs) in that regards. Alas! It did not turn out that way.
Come to think of it, I had a paternal cousin who was a huge source of mirth for my sisters and I, whilst we were children, solely because of her different manipulations to create an illusion of a bust. Remember that I said an illusion, because there was nothing there, I’m not lying oh.
She bought extra padded bras, got bra pads to put in the bra, to create any shape in the front; otherwise, she would have been as flat chested as the rest of us.
Anyways, when I saw my cousin last month, she had boooobs all over the place. Biko, don’t ask me how she got it.
Like that 9ice song, “Makan, makan loye e kan” (meaning, chieftaincy titles are often turn by turn, one after another.) Well, it soon became our turn to create an illusion of bust. I won’t tell you some of the things my sisters and I have tried, but we thank God for the extra padded bras of nowadays.
And also thanks to my fellow sojourner, Patience, who linked me to a supplier of padded bras. Patience can be crazy and touchy regarding her breasts. We live in the same neighbourhood, in fact, her aunties were my younger twins’ nannies, so that was our first point of connection, before we realised that we were similar in em ah other areas too.
We were catching up one time and she had told me about one day when she hadn’t been wearing a bra, and a young man, who had been passing by had nearly stumbled looking at her flat chest in comparison with the rest of her curvy self and she had asked him, “You never see woman wey no get breasts before?”
I had burst into laughter. How wicked! The young man must have been mortified at being caught staring at a woman’s bust or chest. You get my drift.
Even though I still have hang-ups, this isn’t my teenage self talking, this is the adult and I’m merely writing about my reality of living with small breasts for close to 20 years now, especially after going through two breast feeding sessions and what’s left of them. I’m sure ‘awesomely endowed’ ladies like me can relate with this.
- As a teenager, you keep hoping that your boobs would still grow
This was so me! I held onto the hope that my breasts would grow as the years went by. That I would be able to buy a bra that wasn’t the smallest size and actually fill it up. That by its growth, I would stop feeling awkward about getting naked, even when it was just girls around.
I had all these dreams of having bigger breasts but none of it happened. It’s just not in my genes. Tough luck.
- Don’t worry, they will grow!
True, they will grow…when you get knocked up. They will grow beyond your imagination sef and you can enjoy it several months after childbirth too. It’s a great feeling, going from being flat chested one minute to having a pair of breasts you can flaunt. Suddenly, the mirage of a cleavage starts to appear. Wow!!! Just recalling it feels greats.
The sad part; I still have bras that I can no longer wear, because there is nothing to fill them with. Okay, the bras haven’t gone, because they are reminders of my glorious busty days.
- “Cleavage” excites you
Having lived for so long with my breasts, we know how to “package” ourselves, create illusions and when we succeed, especially for clothes that require cleavage, (not to show o, but seem to show), it’s a thing of joy.
You know when you take a selfie and you were able to capture yourself in a particularly fine angle, you find yourself going back to that picture again and again; that is what happens when I get the cleavage “thingy” right. I want to look at myself all day in that ensemble.
- Other women’s boobs fascinate you
Please, if you have ever caught me staring at your boobs, I mean no harm, I’m just wondering why you have so much on you, when all I needed was just a little bit more.
I know it’s not your fault, it is just my genes but your boobs fascinate me, as does the show, Dr 90210 that I used to watch, and I would fantasise about having breast implants, once I had some loose cash.
Anyways, that is still somewhere on my bucket list, if I ever get to it.
- You work harder for a flat tummy
Yes, because you are always at risk of having your boobs disappear if your tummy blends with your chest.
You get a tiny tummy with smaller breasts and suddenly everyone is wondering if you are pregnant.
And if you are really unlucky, your whole body could be getting fat but not your boobs, which is a good way to go flat chested.
For ladies with bigger set of boobs, gaining a little weight doesn’t make your chest look flatter. However, for us smaller girls, if we do gain small weight in the middle, we might as well say good bye to our boobs, which means we have to work even harder to maintain a good physique to make our chests look great.
In all, even though my tiny, non-existent boobs might annoy me to no end sometimes, they are part of my identity.
In addition, they come with the perks of me, being able to go braless and not worry about jingling all over the place or being prey to booby boys.
Did I capture all the struggles of a woman with small breasts? You can share yours in the comment section.
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