Tayo’s Infertility Diary 66: Deny The Chemistry


November 24, 2008

CD14 Peak

I have some good news! No, not a BFP (yet!!!) but a PEAK on my monitor! Unfortunately, it comes at not a good time at all. We couldn’t BD last night or this morning, as I have a pap smear (i couldn’t put it off as I have to have 1 a year, after the borderline results I got before, and they insist 14 days from last AF for the clearest results, which I guess is important as this has been going on for a few years now.) I guess I could do it when i’m back from the doctors, but she will have used a load of lube, I’m guessing? Oh well! If I am up to it, we may still try.

I also checked my CP last night and there was no EWCM. It also wasn’t as sqishy as the night before…which is pretty odd. I had ovulation pains all yesterday too. Plus Javier and I are speaking now, but we haven’t actually, really cleared the air.


November 25, 2008

Well, mission accomplished! I went for the smear, and hardly noticed it, as the doctor and I were chatting so much! Then I got home and stuck a load of Preseed up me, to help Javier’s swimmers and cancel out any lube the nurse used. Thankfully, we were able to BD! I stayed in bed for nearly an hour afterwards, and I feel better now. That is our only chance this month, as I go to work early tomorrow and he will be away until Monday when I get back.

So…things still not great but getting better. And my stomach is churning a bit about work tomorrow.

As if that was not enough, Ugo has resumed with his text-stalking. But the bobo is now bordering on delusional.

Don’t shut me out, Tayo. Don’t deny the chemistry we have. I know you also felt it when we were in Nigeria. Let’s talk about this!

I read that text probably 100 times, before deleting it. At first, I was infuriated by it. How dare he make such an assertion, when all I’d been trying to do was help. But after a while, fear replaced my anger as, truthfully, I had also felt the chemistry…however fleeting. But it was just a shadow of what it is I feel for Javier, my beloved husband whom I would not trade for all the Denzel Washingtons of this world! With a long hiss, I deleted the text message. There was no need replying it and feeding his delusion.

The only person I felt really sorry for was Solape…who had just had a baby with a man who no longer wanted to be with her. I’m struggling with what to do…to tell her or not. But knowing how volatile and erratic the girl can be, I have decided not to get myself involved at all! Lord knows I have enough problems of my own!

So it was pretty much the best day in the world. In the evening, I got an email from work, with them wanting me to write every incident down as evidence, so they can look at it. I’m going to tell them tomorrow that they can have what I have alread written, but I am fed up with it now. She is not getting away with it! I can’t work like this!

Anyway, I’m off to my Aunt’s place in Colchester for the week while Javier is away. I figured I might as well get a change of scenery, instead of dying of boredom and loneliness here!

On the up side, I couldn’t sleep last nigt as had a really bad pain in my left hip all night. I presume it was ovulation? My hip is still a bit sore. 1DPO for me tomorrow! YAY! Come on, Christmas BFP!



Photo Credit

  1. http://media.syracuse.com/
  2. https://qph.ec.quoracdn.net


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