Ivana’s Diary 18- Realities!


Dear Diary,

I had no other person to call and it’s all because her phone number is in my diary. When she came, she looked like the volcano, she walked into my hotel room as though she owned it and stopped, turning to face me.

“What do you want Ivana?” She asked.

“I need your help…I had no one else to call, your number was in my diary.” I said.

“Hmmm…” She said and looked at me. “How much is the bill and for much longer do you intend to stay here?”

I handed her the bill and watched as she looked at the sum, I closed my eyes in fear as I knew she’d have a strict word for me. I had called her with the phone at the hotel reception and as I did, I watched the receptionist stare at me as though I had tried to scam the hotel management with a cock and bull story.

“How’s Nnamdi?” I asked.

“What do you care?” She asked.

“I…care for him, you know I do.”

“Really? By lying to him? By dumping him without a word?” She spat.

“Don’t get that way, you won’t understand.” I said. “I know I lied to you all about the pregnancy…and I feel so bad for it.”

“You left him right? Why don’t you forget about asking of him? You also lied about being pregnant but that’s my business.” She said.

“I know I took you all by surprise especially Nnamdi and I know I disrespected the family by asking for a separation.”

“Nnamdi is my son, he’s a grown man and you are his wife. You didn’t disrespect me, you disrespected him.” She said looking at the room I had lodged in.

“I’m due to return to Canada…next week.” I said quietly. “I’ll go back, pack my bags and leave…then contact a divorce lawyer…” I said as I choked on a sob.

A loud slap almost turned my head backwards, I couldn’t believe my mother in-law had slapped me.

“What did you do that for?” I asked, rubbing my cheek.

“I did that to make you know how selfish you really are! You are selfish Ivana! Thinking only about yourself and not about those who love you, about those who would do anything for you. Since Nnamdi returned Nigeria last night, he hasn’t eaten anything, he hasn’t spoken to anyone all because he can’t figure out why you left him. What do you want from marriage Ivana? What do you really want? A bed of roses? A flowing spring? What? Tell him and together, you’ll make it work.” She said.

“Ha! Don’t you think you’re being hypocritical? You don’t love me, you love your son’s ex-girlfriend, Amaka.”

“So? Yes, I love her but I’m the one to choose a wife for my son? Nnamdi dated her for years but they separated and he found you and decided that he loved you and wanted you. I have no say in that aspect of his life and I’m not going to meddle.”

I broke down in tears.

“In my life, I’ve never seen a more calculative swindler like you. You have been on contraceptives since you got married and Nnamdi had been hoping for children. You are going to find yourself in a deeper mess than you think if you continue living life the way you are. Yes, you got married but you never settled. There’s something called setting down and when a woman or a man does that, he or she is ready to work hard to keep his or her marriage together but you don’t have that in mind. You are one leg in and one leg out and it’s no good for your marriage and most of all, it’s not good for Nnamdi because he really loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you.”

I felt so heartbroken, I cried and cried, I saw my mother in me. She had been so unsatisfied by what my father had to offer that she went chasing big things and look where it landed her? She never got the satisfaction she wanted or craved. I was exactly like her yet I was so quick to judge her.

“I am sorry…I realize my mistakes…I am sorry…please forgive me…” I cried.

She looked at me for a long while and said.

“Ivana, let’s go home!”

As we left the hotel that evening and I loaded my bags into her small car, I finally felt peace wash up to me like the waves on a seashore and I knew that I’d finally gotten it right. I was doing the right thing!



Catch up on Ivana’s story here:


  1. Ivana’s Diary 1: This thing called marriage
  2. Ivana’s Diary 2: Hot Dark Chocolate
  3. Ivana’s Diary 3: My Mother
  4. Ivana’s Diary 4: The Return
  5. Ivana’s Diary 5: Murder-In-Law
  6. Ivana’s Diary 6: The Sexomaniac
  7. Ivana’s Diary 7: Mrs. Regret
  8. Ivana’s Diary 8: Monster-In-Law & The High School Sweetheart
  9. Ivana’s Diary 9: Room-mates or a Couple?
  10. Ivana’s Diary 10: Dilemma
  11. Ivana’s Diary 11: Jumping the Gun
  12. Ivana’s Diary 12: The Truth
  13. Ivana’s Diary 13: Dear Daddy!
  14. Ivana’s Diary 14: Real vs Fake Daddy
  15. Ivana’s Diary 15: Confessions
  16. Ivana’s Diary 16: The Big Decision
  17. Ivana’s Diary 17: A Ghastly Mistake




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