Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 96: Dispassionately

3
1313

May 13th, 2013

I received Ebika’s ‘victory news’ with very mixed feelings. She called to tell me that Oyinkan has finally agreed to move to America…permanently. What was initially planned as a short-term trip, to give birth to her baby, has now become a permanent arrangement, with her relocating with her other kids…for good. As she squealed and rejoiced over this news, I could only manage a bit of polite laughter, as my heart was inexplicably heavy. It finally dawned on me that Oyinkan, a woman like me, and pregnant like me, is losing her marriage…her stability…at the worst possible time.

When the call was over, I couldn’t help but check Oyinkan’s Instagram page, and my heart crashed to my stomach, when I saw that, for the past week, she had only been posting very cryptic messages…of letting go, and moving on. Her most recent post had the silhouette of a woman walking on a beach, and she had captioned it; Sometimes, you have to know when to keep fighting…and when to walk away. #IChooseToBeHappy #ItsNotWorthIt #LivingForMyKids #ThanksForEverythingGuys #YouAreTheBest #IHaveTheBestFriends #TimeToMoveOnNow #ThatGoesForEveryone #NoMoreFighting #TheWarIsOver

Many of them were apparently privy to more information, and proceeded to console Oyinkan, assuring her of their friendship and support. But most of the general comments mauled Ebika to roadkill!!! The comments there were bloody…to say the very least! I pray she never gets to read them, as they will destroy her, thick skin or not. I was even shocked to read that some of them were even aware of Ebika’s gynaecological issues, and went on to call her a ‘barren bitch’! Na wa for social media! It absolutely isn’t for the faint hearted at all, at all!

But sorry as I was for Ebika, I found myself sorrier still for Oyinkan. It’s sad that one person’s ‘victory’ is inadvertently the other person’s loss. Looking at things dispassionately, Oyinkan is the actual victim in all this. She was sitting down, minding her own business, when Demola came to marry her, a young girl of 22, 23 years of age. Now, after 3 kids, and the 4th on the way, he decides he wants to be with his ‘true love’. She didn’t do anything to anybody, and doesn’t deserve this hand she has been dealt. And she is a lot nicer than many other women would have been in this instance, who would have taken their fight off Instagram a long time ago! She never even confronted Ebika physically.

Ah well. Ebika is my friend, and the one to whom I owe my allegiance, so I might as well stop crying over Oyinkan, and be happy for my friend. She’s back this weekend, and I’m so happy about that!

Getting home, I saw the lights in Nwando’s former apartment were on. Her sister moved in almost immediately after the wedding, two weeks ago, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to say hello. But today, I decided to knock and be a friendly neighbour, at least. Opening the door, I was surprised that it wasn’t the sister I’d thought it was. I thought it was her younger sister I’d met here before, but this lady standing in front of me is actually one of her older ones.

“Don’t look so surprised!” she laughed.

I quickly had to compose myself, and laughed as well.

“My younger sister got an apartment in Obalende, closer to her office,” she clarified, before ushering me in, and introducing herself as Jide.

“Njideka!” she laughed, at my bewildered expression. “But everyone calls me Jide!”

As we chatted, my spirit soared to realize she has more of Nwando’s high spirited personality…not quite like the sister I’d met before, who seemed…well…rather dry. Jide, on the other hand, appears bubbly and full of life, just like my beloved Nwando.

“I thought Nwando said her older sisters live in Port Harcourt…” I said, still wondering how come she was here.

Jide shrugged. “My sister and I did live there…she still does. She has a good job with Shell, and things are working out for her. I just turned 40, and was doing some self assessment. I have been in Port Harcourt for over 10 years, and nothing has clicked for me…not with my career, or even a husband. Then an old friend pulled some strings to get me a job…but here in Lagos. Nothing was holding me in PH, so I decided to move here,” she laughed, “Besides, my sister found love in Lagos…so maybe I might as well!”

I laughed with her, not having the heart to remind her that Nwando had found love with an old boyfriend, and not with someone new. But looking at Jide, who is an even prettier version of Nwando, and who doesn’t look a day older than 30, something told me she wouldn’t have a problem in this regard.

Getting to my apartment, I plopped myself on the couch. I get tired a whole lot easier these days, and my bump is getting even more heavy to carry. But then again, it’s understandable, as I clock 30 weeks on Thursday. 30 weeks! Even writing it sounds surreal! 30 weeks! Wow!

In 10 weeks, or maybe even less, I will meet my little person!

I can hardly wait!!!

 

Untitled

 

Catch up on Faith’s story here:

  1. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 1: BFP
  2. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 2: Lukewarm Response
  3. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 3: The Struggle
  4. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 4: Tricked
  5. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 5: Keeping her man
  6. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 6: Men are so annoying!
  7. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 7: Bleeding
  8. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 8: The 9 Week Mark
  9. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 9: Festive
  10. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 10: The Holiday
  11. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 11: This thing called love
  12. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 12: The Pregnancy Glow
  13. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 13: The Baby & The Bobo
  14. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 14: Wahala
  15. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 15: The Abortion
  16. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 16: A Good Man
  17. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 17: Joy…and Pain
  18. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 18: Hostage
  19. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 19: Ammunition
  20. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 20: Famzing
  21. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 21: Stress Relief
  22. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 22: Diana
  23. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 23: Bestos
  24. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 24: The Miscarriage 
  25. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 25: In God’s Hands
  26. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 26: Crossing the line
  27. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 27: Last Minute Packing
  28. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 28: Ex-Girlfriend
  29. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 29: Not just friends
  30. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 30: Fight for him
  31. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 31: Faded Beauty
  32. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 32: Holiday Glow
  33. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 33: The Proposals 
  34. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 34: Baby Kicks
  35. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 35: Celebration Dinner
  36. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 36: Rainbow Baby
  37. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 37: Lunch with the girls
  38. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 38: Wedding Season
  39. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 39: Mama Patrick
  40. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 40: Misplaced Love
  41. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 41: Okafor’s Law
  42. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 42: Forgiveness
  43. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 43: Get it over with
  44. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 44: Family Meeting
  45. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 45: The Goof
  46. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 46: Worship
  47. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 47: Gender
  48. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 48: The Introduction
  49. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 49: Messy
  50. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 50: Passionate Love
  51. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 51: Instagram Drama
  52. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 52: 21 Weeks
  53. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 53: Oppressed
  54. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 54: Age is just a number
  55. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 55: Legally Together
  56. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 56: Monkey on my back
  57. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 57: Your secret is safe with me
  58. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 58: Spring in my step
  59. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 59: Level don change
  60. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 60: It’s my time
  61. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 61: Drama and Baby Kicks
  62. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 62: Love, Joy, Fear
  63. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 63: Owerri
  64. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 64: Untouchable
  65. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 65: Foot Soldiers
  66. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 66: Dem say, Dem say
  67. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 67: The Side Chick and the Fiancee
  68. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 68: Dim-Witted Brother
  69. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 69: Day from hell
  70. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 70: A Cancelled Wedding & a Kept Woman
  71. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 71: From Bad to Worst
  72. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 72: The Confrontation
  73. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 73: Away we go!
  74. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 74: Birthday Girl
  75. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 75: Caught Red-Handed
  76. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 76: Played by a Master Manipulator
  77. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 77: Showdown
  78. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 78: Sad Tears, Happy Tears
  79. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 79: Not the forever kind of love
  80. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 80: My Sacred Vow to You
  81. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 81: Facebook Likes
  82. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 82: Pregnancy Queue
  83. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 83: Braxton Hicks
  84. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 84: The Verdict
  85. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 85: Home Sweet Home
  86. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 86: The Bridal Shower
  87. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 87: The Scare
  88. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 88: Nwando’s Wedding
  89. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 89: Time to face the music
  90. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 90: The Witch Hunt
  91. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 91: Bump Envy
  92. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 92: This Evil Family
  93. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 93: Thankful
  94. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 94: People Watching
  95. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 95: New Beginnings

0

3 COMMENTS

  1. I cant wait for the 10 weeks ooo!

    I really feel sad for Oyinkan ooo, I wish Demola had just settled with Ebika from the beginning and and not have to put Oyinkan through this nonsense.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here