Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 80: My Sacred Vow to You!

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April 21st, 2013

Walking into that common room on Sunday afternoon was one of the most mind blowing experiences of my life. The bare and basic room had been transformed into a vision of peach and gold loveliness, with organza and tulle draping and rice lights criss crossing the normally stark ceiling. The guest chairs were draped in romantic peach, and the most gorgeous white, peach, gold, and red floral arrangements adorned the tables.

“Wow!” Ebika marveled, as we took our seats.

I was too mesmerized to even respond.

Looking around, as the other guests took their seats, I realized it wasn’t as big a party as I had feared it would be. Apart from Diana’s 4 siblings, and their spouses, and their Uncle and Aunt who had been their caretakers in the UK, there in attendance were their Pastor and his wife, another couple from their Church, Ebika and I, Diana’s doctor, and a few other members of her medical team. I counted about 26 people. I felt momentarily sad that I was the only one representing the groom’s side, and I felt a deep emptiness without Idara. She is…was…my only ‘family member’ here in the UK, and having her here would have been a given. It suddenly hit me that I had possibly lost her as a friend…forever…and that thought made my heart hurt.

But I didn’t have long to think about that, as Lionel Richie’s Three Times a Lady started playing, and, in the arm of her older brother, Jacob, Diana was led into the room. My eyes immediately filled with tears. She looked beautiful in a white gypsy dress, with her natural hair adorned with a large red rose fascinator. But the real beauty shone from within, as her smile, her beautiful smile, lit up her face, and indeed the entire room. But she had eyes only for one person. Her groom, who stood at the other side of the room, dapper in his black tuxedo, and smiling at his bride. He too had tears in his eyes. Looking around, there was hardly a dry eye in the room…and we hadn’t even started the ceremony yet.

The sermon was short and sweet. Their Pastor gave a beautiful talk about love and agreement, and it resonated deeply, even for me. Soon, it was time for them to exchange their vows, and their self-written personalized vows brought more tears in the room.

“Diana…on this day,

I give you my heart.

I give you my promise,

That I will walk with you,

Hand in hand,

Anywhere our journey leads us,

Living, and learning, and loving,

Together,

Forever.”

 

“Phillip, I promise to be your lover, your companion, and your friend,

I promise to be your partner in parenthood,

Your ally in conflict,

Your greatest fan, 

Your comrade in adventure,

Your student and your teacher,

Your consolation in disappointment,

Your accomplice in mischief.

This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things…All things!”

 

And then they had their first dance to a medley Stevie Wonder’s My Cherie Amour, Anita Baker’s Sweet Love, and 2face Idibia’s If Love is a Crime. As they danced, it was clear that to them, they were the only ones in the room, as they whispered, and laughed, and cuddled. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

All in, it was a beautiful, beautiful ceremony…beautiful couple, beautiful music, beautiful food, beautiful company…everything was perfect.

Alas, after two hours, it all had to come to an end, as that was the limit Diana’s doctor had permitted. We left the newlyweds to retire to her room, and we all dispersed. The day was still young, so Ebika and I decided to go to the West End, which was a 20 minute walk from the station.

“I might as well drink away my sorrows!” Ebika laughed, a bit too cheerfully, as she ordered a Margarita, when we were settled in a popular bar. “After tomorrow, my life could change forever!”

Even though I was tempted to give her the usual platitudes of how she should have faith that everything would be okay, I didn’t want to give her any false hope. So, I chose not to talk about tomorrow’s appointment, and instead chose to gist about rubbish. We had laughs reading the latest gist on the popular Nigerian blogs, and even trolled through Instagram. When we were done with that, we proceeded to people-watch in the bar, and had a field day with the different characters that walking in and out of the bar, and prowling around Leicester Square.

By the time we left the bar, we were high on laughter, all worries temporarily set aside. We laughed and gossiped our way through the train ride back to Hammersmith, and as we walked to our flat from the tube station.

But all our laughter ceased, when we saw the person sitting on our doorstep

As he saw us approach, Demola rose to his feet, and for the first time, he didn’t look like the suave, smooth man I had met once, or seen on Instagram. The man standing there looked like he hadn’t had a wink of sleep. His hair looked uncombed, and his otherwise well groomed goatee looked rough, and was specked with several gray hairs.

Without a word, Ebika rushed into his arms, and they held each other, out there in the cold April evening. I was touched beyond words. When I told him about Ebika’s condition yesterday, he had said he would be on the first flight out…but I hadn’t quite believed him. I just felt I had to do the needful and let him know, but I hadn’t held much hope that he would actually come. But here he was…he had truly taken the first flight out.

I know that his presence will be enough to make whatever outcome tomorrow brings, a whole lot more bearable for my friend.

 

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Catch up on Faith’s story here:

  1. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 1: BFP
  2. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 2: Lukewarm Response
  3. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 3: The Struggle
  4. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 4: Tricked
  5. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 5: Keeping her man
  6. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 6: Men are so annoying!
  7. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 7: Bleeding
  8. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 8: The 9 Week Mark
  9. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 9: Festive
  10. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 10: The Holiday
  11. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 11: This thing called love
  12. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 12: The Pregnancy Glow
  13. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 13: The Baby & The Bobo
  14. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 14: Wahala
  15. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 15: The Abortion
  16. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 16: A Good Man
  17. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 17: Joy…and Pain
  18. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 18: Hostage
  19. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 19: Ammunition
  20. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 20: Famzing
  21. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 21: Stress Relief
  22. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 22: Diana
  23. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 23: Bestos
  24. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 24: The Miscarriage 
  25. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 25: In God’s Hands
  26. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 26: Crossing the line
  27. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 27: Last Minute Packing
  28. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 28: Ex-Girlfriend
  29. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 29: Not just friends
  30. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 30: Fight for him
  31. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 31: Faded Beauty
  32. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 32: Holiday Glow
  33. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 33: The Proposals 
  34. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 34: Baby Kicks
  35. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 35: Celebration Dinner
  36. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 36: Rainbow Baby
  37. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 37: Lunch with the girls
  38. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 38: Wedding Season
  39. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 39: Mama Patrick
  40. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 40: Misplaced Love
  41. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 41: Okafor’s Law
  42. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 42: Forgiveness
  43. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 43: Get it over with
  44. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 44: Family Meeting
  45. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 45: The Goof
  46. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 46: Worship
  47. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 47: Gender
  48. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 48: The Introduction
  49. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 49: Messy
  50. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 50: Passionate Love
  51. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 51: Instagram Drama
  52. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 52: 21 Weeks
  53. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 53: Oppressed
  54. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 54: Age is just a number
  55. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 55: Legally Together
  56. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 56: Monkey on my back
  57. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 57: Your secret is safe with me
  58. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 58: Spring in my step
  59. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 59: Level don change
  60. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 60: It’s my time
  61. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 61: Drama and Baby Kicks
  62. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 62: Love, Joy, Fear
  63. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 63: Owerri
  64. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 64: Untouchable
  65. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 65: Foot Soldiers
  66. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 66: Dem say, Dem say
  67. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 67: The Side Chick and the Fiancee
  68. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 68: Dim-Witted Brother
  69. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 69: Day from hell
  70. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 70: A Cancelled Wedding & a Kept Woman
  71. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 71: From Bad to Worst
  72. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 72: The Confrontation
  73. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 73: Away we go!
  74. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 74: Birthday Girl
  75. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 75: Caught Red-Handed
  76. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 76: Played by a Master Manipulator
  77. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 77: Showdown
  78. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 78: Sad Tears, Happy Tears
  79. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 79: Not the forever kind of love

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