Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 79: Not the Forever Kind of Love

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April 20th, 2013

The one person I thought would be hopping mad about the impromptu wedding arrangement, turned out to be the one who was most excited. My Mom broke into songs of praise when I told her, and jubilated for so long that I had to remind her it was an international call. Contrary to my fears, she wasn’t even so upset about not being at her first son’s wedding. She apparently feels stronger about the fact that he and Diana will be a formal couple by the time the baby gets here. Of course, I had to remind her that this is more of a blessing, as they will still have to formalize their union in court later on. But to her, this was a mere detail. She said she would rather focus her energy preparing for a grand traditional wedding in Nigeria, than for them to ‘keep on living in sin’.

“If I had a penny for every time Mom has said that to me, in the last week!” Phillip laughed, as we walked through the Westfield Mall, in search of the H Samuel jewelry shop. “Everytime I spoke with her, even before leaving Naija, it was all about living in sin! I had to remind her that this my supposed sinful lover will be on a hospital bed the entire time of this ‘living’ oh!”

“Your Mother is way too dramatic.” I laughed in agreement.

“It’s no wonder where you got it from!” Phillip teased, giving me the side eye.

I rolled my eyes in response, but was so pleased to finally be back on good terms with my brother.

After selecting the most beautiful wedding bands, we decided to have lunch in the food court.

“I didn’t know you and Idara went all the way back to when Eme died.” I just had to say, because it was eating me up inside.

He shrugged. “I was at my lowest point. You know how badly I took her death.”

Yep, I remember too well. Eme had been the baby of the family, and had died on the eve of her 16th birthday, no thanks to a hit and run driver a few streets away from our home. We had all been devastated by her loss, and our father had never fully recovered from it. He had died of a heart attack three years later.

“Everyone was mourning. Dad was a nervous wreck, and I had to be strong for everyone.” Phillip continued. “Idara allowed me cry…she allowed me to be vulnerable, and she remained strong for me.”

“She was there for you through a whole lot.” I remarked.

He nodded sadly. “She was…”

“So why didn’t you ever make it official with her? Why did you stay in a toxic relationship if you had something so beautiful with someone else?” I asked, confused.

“I don’t know…” he answered honestly. “I asked myself that question so many times. So many times, I wondered why I wasn’t giving her more…but I was never able to answer that question.”

“Maybe you didn’t love her enough…” I suggested.

Phillip was quiet for a while. “I loved her deeply…but now I see that it wasn’t the forever kind of love. I loved her…I still love her…but as a dear friend…as a sister almost.”

A sister whom you were sleeping with, was what I was tempted to say, but in the interest of peace, I kept my mouth shut.

“I’m going to miss her…but I’m glad you did what you did.” Phillip said, to my surprise. “It was the wake up call I needed. That relationship would have been toxic for my marriage.”

True that!

“Babe, eat up. We need to go look for a suit for me to wear!” he said, rising to his feet.

“Suit?! For a hospital room wedding?” I exclaimed in shock.

He raised an eyebrow. “Hospital room or not, this is my wedding, Madam! No half measures here,” then with a sly smile, he added. “Besides, Vou was able to arrange for one of the hospital common rooms, and when I left the hospital, she was bustling all over the place, with a decorator. She’s planning a shindig, so if I were you, I would dress for the part!”

See me that was planning to just show up there anyhow my mood dictates on Sunday!

After a full day of shopping, during which time I was able to guilt my brother into buying me an outfit for the wedding, we finally made our way back to the hospital. And there I saw that Phillip wasn’t joking at all!

Diana was having a consultation with the lady who would be doing her hair and makeup, and Vou was making last minute arrangements with their caterer. What I thought would be a 5 people (tops) wedding, was now looking like a 20 to 30 people affair.

But in all the hustle and bustle, I couldn’t miss how happy and excited Diana was. She was going to be a bride after all, and she was clearly over the moon about it. And Phillip also seemed just as excited, and often leaned in to kiss or hug his wife-to-be.

The love was overwhelming, and it made me miss my Patrick.

It also gave me the courage to do something I had been thinking of doing all day long. So, I quietly walked out of the room, and found a suitable spot in the general waiting room. I pulled out a phone number I had stolen earlier in the morning, and dialed the number.

“Hello,” came the silky smooth baritone voice.

“Hi, Demola?” I said, with a slight tremble in my voice. “This is Faith, Ebika’s friend. I…I have something to tell you…”

 

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Catch up on Faith’s story here:

  1. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 1: BFP
  2. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 2: Lukewarm Response
  3. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 3: The Struggle
  4. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 4: Tricked
  5. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 5: Keeping her man
  6. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 6: Men are so annoying!
  7. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 7: Bleeding
  8. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 8: The 9 Week Mark
  9. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 9: Festive
  10. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 10: The Holiday
  11. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 11: This thing called love
  12. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 12: The Pregnancy Glow
  13. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 13: The Baby & The Bobo
  14. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 14: Wahala
  15. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 15: The Abortion
  16. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 16: A Good Man
  17. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 17: Joy…and Pain
  18. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 18: Hostage
  19. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 19: Ammunition
  20. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 20: Famzing
  21. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 21: Stress Relief
  22. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 22: Diana
  23. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 23: Bestos
  24. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 24: The Miscarriage 
  25. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 25: In God’s Hands
  26. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 26: Crossing the line
  27. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 27: Last Minute Packing
  28. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 28: Ex-Girlfriend
  29. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 29: Not just friends
  30. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 30: Fight for him
  31. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 31: Faded Beauty
  32. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 32: Holiday Glow
  33. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 33: The Proposals 
  34. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 34: Baby Kicks
  35. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 35: Celebration Dinner
  36. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 36: Rainbow Baby
  37. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 37: Lunch with the girls
  38. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 38: Wedding Season
  39. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 39: Mama Patrick
  40. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 40: Misplaced Love
  41. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 41: Okafor’s Law
  42. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 42: Forgiveness
  43. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 43: Get it over with
  44. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 44: Family Meeting
  45. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 45: The Goof
  46. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 46: Worship
  47. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 47: Gender
  48. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 48: The Introduction
  49. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 49: Messy
  50. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 50: Passionate Love
  51. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 51: Instagram Drama
  52. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 52: 21 Weeks
  53. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 53: Oppressed
  54. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 54: Age is just a number
  55. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 55: Legally Together
  56. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 56: Monkey on my back
  57. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 57: Your secret is safe with me
  58. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 58: Spring in my step
  59. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 59: Level don change
  60. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 60: It’s my time
  61. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 61: Drama and Baby Kicks
  62. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 62: Love, Joy, Fear
  63. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 63: Owerri
  64. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 64: Untouchable
  65. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 65: Foot Soldiers
  66. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 66: Dem say, Dem say
  67. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 67: The Side Chick and the Fiancee
  68. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 68: Dim-Witted Brother
  69. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 69: Day from hell
  70. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 70: A Cancelled Wedding & a Kept Woman
  71. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 71: From Bad to Worst
  72. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 72: The Confrontation
  73. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 73: Away we go!
  74. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 74: Birthday Girl
  75. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 75: Caught Red-Handed
  76. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 76: Played by a Master Manipulator
  77. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 77: Showdown
  78. Faith’s Pregnancy Diary 78: Sad Tears, Happy Tears

 

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