Confessions of a Fat Girl 222: A Complex Life

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December 19, 2010

Today was one heck of a strange day!

We’d barely gotten back from Church, and had just had a late breakfast, when I was notified that ‘Legachi’s friend was here, with his brother’. Irritated, I asked my guard why he hadn’t informed them that the said Legachi was out (she hadn’t returned home with us after Church, saying she had to dash to the mainland to prepare for a colleague’s bridal shower in the afternoon), only to be told that they wanted to see me!

Me ke?!

“Which of her friends?” I asked, my interest piqued.

“That oga wey dey come with black jeep.” my guard answered.

Huh?! Ahanna?! And his brother?! Interesting.

JJ made a quick getaway upstairs, when I notified him of our ‘guests’.

“I don’t have the mental capacity to deal with that, babes!” he’d muttered, gathering his newspapers and leaving the living room. “For goodness sake, it’s Sunday morning. Don’t people have any visitors etiquette anymore?”

“So you’re leaving me to deal with them on my own?!” I exclaimed.

“You’re the one who granted them entry.” he laughed. “I know you too well, and I know you’re curious about what they have to say. But honey, I’m not. Good luck!”

I had to stifle a hiss, as Ahanna and his older brother were ushered in shortly after.

“Na wa oh. This is quite a surprise!” I said, a forced smile on my face.

“Good morning, Ihunna.” Ahanna answered sombrely. “This is my older brother, Afam.”

I half smiled, half curtsied at his older brother, a man who looked to be in his mid-50s at least. I reckoned he’s the same brother who helped Legachi get the job in his bank.

“We are here about your sister, Legachi.” Afam said, when we were seated. “Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t even involve myself in something like this. But these are not normal circumstances.”

I stole a glance at Ahanna, and was amazed by how much he’d emaciated since the last time I saw him, exactly two weeks ago. He looked haggard and unkempt, very unlike the well groomed man Legachi had presented to us.

“It was his staff who called me to intervene in this matter.” Afam continued. “He has not been able to function for the last two weeks. My younger brother is very money and business driven. He doesn’t even slow down during Christmas. So, for him not to be able to coordinate himself for his own business…I knew it was time I stepped in.”

“I have seen Legachi with one young boy a few times.” Ahanna said, his voice laden with the dejection he felt. “She has refused to take my calls or even see me, and now she has already found someone else! Is that how much our relationship meant to her, that she couldn’t even wait a couple of weeks before discarding me in the trash?!”

“My friend, get a grip of yourself!” Afam scolded angrily. “In fact, leave. I want to talk to Madam alone.”

That was when I saw there were tears in Ahanna’s eyes. I stared in shock as he reluctantly left the room. I knew he loved my sister, but I hadn’t expected to see him in this depth of despondency.

Afam sighed deeply. “Madam, please what can you do for us? How can you help this situation, before that boy wrecks himself? In all his 35 years on this earth, I have never seen him break down like this. And frankly, it worries me.”

“Oga…” I began.

“Please, call me Afam.” the older man said, smiling.

Okaaaay.

“Afam, I understand your concern, and I’m sure I would have felt the same way if he were my brother…but let’s call a spade a spade. Those two are not well suited for each other. There is a 13 year age gap, for starters…”

Afam laughed heartily. “The age gap means nothing! I am almost 15 years older than my own wife. Why are you talking like you don’t know we like to marry our women young, from our part of the country. And besides, at 22, Legachi isn’t exactly a child bride.”

I nodded. “You are correct, Sir. Large age gaps are not uncommon. But in my family, they are. My husband is only a few years older than I am. Likewise the spouses of my other sisters. And at 22, Legachi still has some growing up ahead of her.”

Afam shook his head. “With due respect, Madam…”

“Please, Sir. Call me Ihunna.”

He cleared his throat. “Ihunna, with due respect, I disagree. If the age gap is the only factor, then there truly is no basis for this separation.”

“But we both know that isn’t the only factor, Afam” I interjected. “There is still the issue of the family your brother has in Japan.”

At that, Afam leaned back in his seat and exhaled deeply again. “That marriage! I knew I should have stopped it when he came up with that foolish idea.” after pondering for a while, he leaned towards me. “Ihunna, he knows he made a mistake. He is already in the process of ending the marriage, and he will be a free man soon.”

“But there are children involved, Afam.” I countered. “And from what I hear, his wife isn’t keen on giving him a divorce. But even more importantly, your brother himself is still carrying on like a family man. Did you know he was still with her as of a few months ago? Did you know he still sleeps in their house when he travels there?”

Afam frowned and immediately looked 10 years older, the weight of his brother’s complex life on his shoulders.

“He has made a lot of mistakes, but he is ready to remedy them now. As for Hoshi, it’s money she’s really after. Once we agree on a settlement, she’ll agree to the divorce immediately. Just talk to your sister, please. Ask her to at least give Ahanna audience. Ask her to at least hear him out.”

I shrugged. “I’m not sure if I can do that. That will be like taking her back. The girl has recovered from the pain and moved on with her life…”

Afam stared at me for a few moments, before abruptly rising to his feet. “We will give you some more time. Please think about what I’ve said.”

As he walked out of the compound, I caught a glimpse of Ahanna standing by the gate, eagerly awaiting feedback, and my heart broke for him. He genuinely appears to be taking this breakup badly. But the ball isn’t in either of our courts. It’s in Legachi’s.

In other news, I leave for Enugu tomorrow. It’s going to be strange not going with my family, but I have adequately prepared even for their own trip.  Thankfully, it’s only about an hour’s drive from Owerri airport to Nkwerre, so hopefully, they should be fine. And Legachi will be there to play the role of mother hen till I can join them on Friday. Three drivers from JJ’s company left yesterday, two with separate cars to Nkwerre, and one with a Hilux truck to Enugu for my use. With all the running around for the wedding, amma need all the mobilisation I can gather. Ogonna won’t be coming until Boxing Day, so it’s pretty much Aunty Carol and myself at this point. Oh, and Legachi! The girl has to make herself useful!

 

 

Photo Credit

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Catch up on Ihunna’s story here:

  1. Confessions of a Fat Girl 1: Grubbido
  2. Confessions of a Fat Girl 2: Fragile
  3. Confessions of a Fat Girl 3: Defiant
  4. Confessions of a Fat Girl 4: Progress
  5. Confessions of a Fat Girl 5: The Gym
  6. Confessions of a Fat Girl 6: Killjoy
  7. Confessions of a Fat Girl 7: Pain
  8. Confessions of a Fat Girl 8: Frenemies
  9. Confessions of a Fat Girl 9: Exhilarated
  10. Confessions of a Fat Girl 10: Popcorn
  11. Confessions of a Fat Girl 11: Free-fall
  12. Confessions of a Fat Girl 12: Sunday Morning
  13. Confessions of a Fat Girl 13: Mission Reactivated
  14. Confessions of a Fat Girl 14: New Things
  15. Confessions of a Fat Girl 15: Bad Business
  16. Confessions of a Fat Girl 16: Luxury Items
  17. Confessions of a Fat Girl 17: The Solution
  18. Confessions of a Fat Girl 18: Magic Formula
  19. Confessions of a Fat Girl 19: Date Night
  20. Confessions of a Fat Girl 20: Quinoa
  21. Confessions of a Fat Girl 21: Perfect Fit
  22. Confessions of a Fat Girl 22: Keeping In Touch
  23. Confessions of a Fat Girl 23: Delete
  24. Confessions of a Fat Girl 24: Philosophical
  25. Confessions of a Fat Girl 25: Keep it Moving
  26. Confessions of a Fat Girl 26: My Co-Wife
  27. Confessions of a Fat Girl 27: Old Jeans & Old Friends
  28. Confessions of a Fat Girl 28: Prawn Stir Fry
  29. Confessions of a Fat Girl 29: Facebook Tagging
  30. Confessions of a Fat Girl 30: Detox Part 2
  31. Confessions of a Fat Girl 31: Abs & Crunches
  32. Confessions of a Fat Girl 32: Making Notes
  33. Confessions of a Fat Girl 33: Christmas Party
  34. Confessions of a Fat Girl 34: Ashiedu
  35. Confessions of a Fat Girl 35: Willpower
  36. Confessions of a Fat Girl 36: Packing…and TV
  37. Confessions of a Fat Girl 37: Last Minute
  38. Confessions of a Fat Girl 38: Body Image
  39. Confessions of a Fat Girl 39: Christmas Trip
  40. Confessions of a Fat Girl 40: Christmas in the Village
  41. Confessions of a Fat Girl 41: Daddy’s Girl
  42. Confessions of a Fat Girl 42: 2010
  43. Confessions of a Fat Girl 43: Uzoamaka
  44. Confessions of a Fat Girl 44: Sugar Binge
  45. Confessions of a Fat Girl 45: The E-mail
  46. Confessions of a Fat Girl 46: She whose name must not be repeated
  47. Confessions of a Fat Girl 47: Smokescreen
  48. Confessions of a Fat Girl 48: Running away
  49. Confessions of a Fat Girl 49: Fry-Up
  50. Confessions of a Fat Girl 50: The Only Solution
  51. Confessions of a Fat Girl 51: The Intervention
  52. Confessions of a Fat Girl 52: Tri-State Sisters
  53. Confessions of a Fat Girl 53: Manhattan
  54. Confessions of a Fat Girl 54: Daddy’s Girls
  55. Confessions of a Fat Girl 55: Stunned Silence
  56. Confessions of a Fat Girl 56: Bereavement
  57. Confessions of a Fat Girl 57: The Reconciliation
  58. Confessions of a Fat Girl 58: Staying Back
  59. Confessions of a Fat Girl 59: Friends & Marriage Proposals
  60. Confessions of a Fat Girl 60: Colourful and Happy
  61. Confessions of a Fat Girl 61: Sweet Potato & Chicken Salad
  62. Confessions of a Fat Girl 62: Miss Amerikana
  63. Confessions of a Fat Girl 63: Tragi-Romantic
  64. Confessions of a Fat Girl 64: Dead to me
  65. Confessions of a Fat Girl 65: Love Triangle
  66. Confessions of a Fat Girl 66: Forever my lady
  67. Confessions of a Fat Girl 67: Fight to the death
  68. Confessions of a Fat Girl 68: Hard choice to make
  69. Confessions of a Fat Girl 69: Back to reality
  70. Confessions of a Fat Girl 70: Life Reflections
  71. Confessions of a Fat Girl 71: Oatmeal, Blueberry & Banana Pancakes
  72. Confessions of a Fat Girl 72: The Engagement
  73. Confessions of a Fat Girl 73: Pillow Talk
  74. Confessions of a Fat Girl 74: Secretive Sister
  75. Confessions of a Fat Girl 75: Homemade Soup
  76. Confessions of a Fat Girl 76: Nna Men!
  77. Confessions of a Fat Girl 77: Comfort Food…Healthy Food
  78. Confessions of a Fat Girl 78: Miracle Working God
  79. Confessions of a Fat Girl 79: Lumps, Bumps and Jiggles
  80. Confessions of a Fat Girl 80: Oyibo Boyfriend
  81. Confessions of a Fat Girl 81: Wedding Gowns 
  82. Confessions of a Fat Girl 82: My New Friend
  83. Confessions of a Fat Girl 83: Emotional vs Physical Hunger
  84. Confessions of a Fat Girl 84: Look like an Mgbeke
  85. Confessions of a Fat Girl 85: Food Cravings
  86. Confessions of a Fat Girl 86: Who am I?
  87. Confessions of a Fat Girl 87: Separation, Counselling…Divorce
  88. Confessions of a Fat Girl 88: A Man’s World
  89. Confessions of a Fat Girl 89: Envy, Weight and Love!
  90. Confessions of a Fat Girl 90: Regret
  91. Confessions of a Fat Girl 91: Time to move on
  92. Confessions of a Fat Girl 92: Have some fruit!
  93. Confessions of a Fat Girl 93: Family Easter
  94. Confessions of a Fat Girl 94: Sister Reunion
  95. Confessions of a Fat Girl 95: Perfect Fit; Perfect Surprise
  96. Confessions of a Fat Girl 96: The Love Story
  97. Confessions of a Fat Girl 97: Caught in the middle
  98. Confessions of a Fat Girl 98: Kisses…and Blood
  99. Confessions of a Fat Girl 99: Past…or Present Tense
  100. Confessions of a Fat Girl 100: Jewel
  101. Confessions of a Fat Girl 101: “Ill find you…and I’ll kill you”
  102. Confessions of a Fat Girl 102: Homecoming
  103. Confessions of a Fat Girl 103: Fever Pitch
  104. Confessions of a Fat Girl 104: Whodunit?
  105. Confessions of a Fat Girl 105: The Hypocrite
  106. Confessions of a Fat Girl 106: Message from Mom
  107. Confessions of a Fat Girl 107: Accountability & Responsibility
  108. Confessions of a Fat Girl 108: It’s for the best
  109. Confessions of a Fat Girl 109: Port Harcourt
  110. Confessions of a Fat Girl 110: While you were away
  111. Confessions of a Fat Girl 111: Planning…and a little bit of Salmon
  112. Confessions of a Fat Girl 112: Putting yourself first
  113. Confessions of a Fat Girl 113: Fruit Crumble
  114. Confessions of a Fat Girl 114: Resting Heart Rate
  115. Confessions of a Fat Girl 115: Shishi, he no get
  116. Confessions of a Fat Girl 116: The truth hurts
  117. Confessions of a Fat Girl 117: Veggie Burger
  118. Confessions of a Fat Girl 118: Weight Watchers Porn
  119. Confessions of a Fat Girl 119: The Worst That Can Happen
  120. Confessions of a Fat Girl 120: Baby Dady
  121. Confessions of a Fat Girl 121: Not a Player
  122. Confessions of a Fat Girl 122: Fat versus Fit Brain
  123. Confessions of a Fat Girl 123: Aunty Caroline
  124. Confessions of a Fat Girl 124: Delete his number
  125. Confessions of a Fat Girl 125: Meal Planning
  126. Confessions of a Fat Girl 126: Food Shopping
  127. Confessions of a Fat Girl 127: The Baby Bump
  128. Confessions of a Fat Girl 128: Cavorting, Prevention & Spunk
  129. Confessions of a Fat Girl 129: The secret is out
  130. Confessions of a Fat Girl 130: Postpone the inevitable
  131. Confessions of a Fat Girl 131: Queen of Wishful Thinking
  132. Confessions of a Fat Girl 132: Fat Prison
  133. Confessions of a Fat Girl 133: Some time away
  134. Confessions of a Fat Girl 134: Taking life too seriously
  135. Confessions of a Fat Girl 135: Is this really me?
  136. Confessions of a Fat Girl 136: Soothing
  137. Confessions of a Fat Girl 137: Welcome to the real world
  138. Confessions of a Fat Girl 138: The Storm
  139. Confessions of a Fat Girl 139: Head up!
  140. Confessions of a Fat Girl 140: Half-Year Check
  141. Confessions of a Fat Girl 141: Leave him for his wife
  142. Confessions of a Fat Girl 142: The Plan
  143. Confessions of a Fat Girl 143: Leave of Absence
  144. Confessions of a Fat Girl 144: A Convenient Life
  145. Confessions of a Fat Girl 145: Sensible Snacking
  146. Confessions of a Fat Girl 146: Choices
  147. Confessions of a Fat Girl 147: Probing Questions
  148. Confessions of a Fat Girl 148: Travel Arrangements
  149. Confessions of a Fat Girl 149: The best feeling ever
  150. Confessions of a Fat Girl 150: Not happy
  151. Confessions of a Fat Girl 151: Still Married
  152. Confessions of a Fat Girl 152: Heartbreak
  153. Confessions of a Fat Girl 153: You complete me
  154. Confessions of a Fat Girl 154: Make it work
  155. Confessions of a Fat Girl 155: Love Weight
  156. Confessions of a Fat Girl 156: Pretty Girl
  157. Confessions of a Fat Girl 157: Juice Fast Prep
  158. Confessions of a Fat Girl 158: Better this way
  159. Confessions of a Fat Girl 159: Eat the doughnut
  160. Confessions of a Fat Girl 160: The Stroke
  161. Confessions of a Fat Girl 161: The Hardest Part
  162. Confessions of a Fat Girl 162: Blame Game
  163. Confessions of a Fat Girl 163: A Cerebral Affair
  164. Confessions of a Fat Girl 164: An Epiphany
  165. Confessions of a Fat Girl 165: Regret…Healing
  166. Confessions of a Fat Girl 166: The Old Man’s Talisman
  167. Confessions of a Fat Girl 167: Party in the mouth
  168. Confessions of a Fat Girl 168: The last piece of the puzzle
  169. Confessions of a Fat Girl 169: Ogonna’s Plan
  170. Confessions of a Fat Girl 170: Casual Bystander
  171. Confessions of a Fat Girl 171: My own two eyes 
  172. Confessions of a Fat Girl 172: Leading Lady
  173. Confessions of a Fat Girl 173: Longtime Boyfriend
  174. Confessions of a Fat Girl 174: Bone Dry
  175. Confessions of a Fat Girl 175: Divorcing
  176. Confessions of a Fat Girl 176: Looking out for myself
  177. Confessions of a Fat Girl 177: Dispassionate
  178. Confessions of a Fat Girl 178: Making Amends
  179. Confessions of a Fat Girl 179: You showed your hands
  180. Confessions of a Fat Girl 180: Winter Wonderland
  181. Confessions of a Fat Girl 181: Love conquers all
  182. Confessions of a Fat Girl 182: Business Head
  183. Confessions of a Fat Girl 183: This One Won’t Hurt
  184. Confessions of a Fat Girl 184: Risqué 
  185. Confessions of a Fat Girl 185: Root Canal
  186. Confessions of a Fat Girl 186: No more excuses
  187. Confessions of a Fat Girl 187: Back on the wagon
  188. Confessions of a Fat Girl 188: Big Girls Club
  189. Confessions of a Fat Girl 189: Tired of being pregnant
  190. Confessions of a Fat Girl 190: Beef Stroganoff 
  191. Confessions of Fat Girl 191: Scared…Excited
  192. Confessions of a Fat Girl 192: An Older Man
  193. Confessions of a Fat Girl 193: Futility
  194. Confessions of a Fat Girl 194: Fluke Pregnancy
  195. Confessions of a Fat Girl 195: Naive 
  196. Confessions of a Fat Girl 196: Nowhere to hide
  197. Confessions of a Fat Girl 197: The Snob
  198. Confessions of a Fat Girl 198: Sweet Freedom
  199. Confessions of a Fat Girl 199: The Bribe
  200. Confessions of a Fat Girl 200: Humour Transplant
  201. Confessions of a Fat Girl 201: The Pressure
  202. Confessions of a Fat Girl 202: Tame the beast
  203. Confessions of a Fat Girl 203: Underaged Birthday Boo
  204. Confessions of a Fat Girl 204: Blame it on the Attitude
  205. Confessions of a Fat Girl 205: The Gown…The Groom
  206. Confessions of a Fat Girl 206: Aborted Appointment
  207. Confessions of a Fat Girl 207: Sugar Fix
  208. Confessions of a Fat Girl 208: Residual Bleeding
  209. Confessions of a Fat Girl 209: Catching Feelings
  210. Confessions of a Fat Girl 210: Thanksgiving
  211. Confessions of a Fat Girl 211: Wonder Woman
  212. Confessions of a Fat Girl 212: Frenzied
  213. Confessions of a Fat Girl 213: More than words
  214. Confessions of a Fat Girl 214: Lost Virginity
  215. Confessions of a Fat Girl 215: Age & Japan
  216. Confessions of a Fat Girl 216: Made in Japan
  217. Confessions of a Fat Girl 217: Generational Curse
  218. Confessions of a Fat Girl 218: Logged Out
  219. Confessions of a Fat Girl 219: Whole 30
  220. Confessions of a Fat Girl 220: Christmas Regret
  221. Confessions of a Fat Girl 221: Yoruba Boys

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