Confessions of a Fat Girl 197: Real Housewives Situation


November 06, 2010

As we sat talking in her bedroom the next night, Saturday, I saw that the news was only just sinking into Ogonna’s head.

“I never thought it would happen. Not for me.” she admitted.

“Why? Was there any medical reason you would have thought so?” I asked, wondering why my ever-optimistic sister could have been so pessimistic.

She shook her head. “It was just my age. I had hope in my 30s…of maybe meeting someone and starting a family. But when it hadn’t happened by the time I hit 40…”

I touched my sister’s hand. “But see how God works! Just when you weren’t even thinking of it!”

Ogonna smiled and nodded, but her eyes glazed over.

“You know that was one of the major reasons I didn’t marry Chiemela. I wanted him to be with someone who could at least give him a child…” she said, her voice heavy.

I looked at her, my heart racing in a panic. “Ogonna, I hope you’re not longing for Chiemela!” I said in a hoarse whisper.

She laughed. “Of course not. I was just wondering what could have been, that’s all.” it was her own turn to pat my own hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry. I’m not about to create a Real Housewives-worthy situation between Akwaugo and I.”

“Hian! You better not o! Because that your husband out there will not take any jokes!” I retorted, as we both dissolved into laughter at the thought of what Ifeanyi would do if Ogonna tried to leave him. Ehn! That man that I’m seeing so might be capable of mass murder o! He might just shoot her, and come to Lagos to finish off the rest of us!

“But Ifeanyi is going to drive me crazy this period, I can just feel it! He’s going to watch me like a hawk. I can just feel it!”

“And so he should!” I said defiantly. “Because if not, you won’t sit down in one place. Yes, we thank God for pregnancy at your age…but you also have to help your case and take it easy!”

Ogonna sighed heavily, and I knew she knew I was right.

“And I hope you know this means you can’t attend Akwaugo’s dress fitting!” I said, stating the obvious. “Anyway, I’m sure your husband won’t even let you leave your compound, let alone the country!”

“He’s already even said so. He said I should forget about any trip until December, when it’s time for the traditional wedding!” Ogonna complained.

“Good man! Don’t worry, thank God for Skype!” I tried to console.

“It’s not the same thing!” she sulked.

“Well, my dear! In the absence of bread, you can make do with puff puff!” I teased, giving her a hug and heading off to my room.

Once in my room, I checked the time to make sure it wasn’t too late, before first of all dialing Aunty Caro’s number. She was overjoyed when I broke the news, singing and praising God. Her rejoicing brought tears to my own eyes afresh.

Ogonna is actually pregnant!

She promised to break the news to my dad, who was asleep, before promising to be in Port Harcourt by tomorrow evening, Sunday.

I then proceeded to call Akwaugo with the news. I hadn’t understood why Ogonna was hesitant to share the news with our other sister at first, but after her admission about Chiemela, I had a feeling it had something to do with it.

Akwaugo too had been ecstatic upon hearing the news, exclaiming so loud, I was sure her neighbours would call the cops.

“Hei!!! Ihunna! Can you see God? Can you just see God!!!” she exclaimed, her voice heavy with emotion.

Yes, it is an extremely emotional thing. Extremely.

But then suddenly, Akwaugo’s mood changed.

“If I tell Chiemela this, do you think there will be more pressure on me? What if I’m not able to have any more kids? What if Chiemela starts regretting why he has me, and not Ogonna?”

I stared at my phone incredulously. What on earth is wrong with my sisters? I thought this whole Chiemela thing has been dead and buried! Almost a year later, and after everyone’s choices have been made, we’re still talking about Cheimela and Ogonna???

Haba! People!



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