The TTC journey is only for the brave. Share with us your stories for a chance to win the prize in our May Giveaway
Sharing individual battles with infertility!
The TTC journey is only for the brave. Share with us your stories for a chance to win the prize in our May Giveaway
TTC story by @emaimo
Really, writing a story on this isn’t easy because I am still on the waiting line, expecting God for a miracle. It all started on October 20th, 2012. After our wedding, I was eager to get pregnant because I wanted to be through with child bearing very fast and pursue other issues but to my amazement, the monthly flow were regular. The embarrassing aspect was that I started gaining weight everywhere and where ever I entered, people were thinking I am pregnant. The unbearable aspect is when people call and ask what you are waiting for. Embarrassing in all this, some people just keep glaring at my belly when ever I go to church. My journey of trying to conceive has been made a night made by my mother in law because she believes so much in traditional medicines. I have drank so many things I can’t explain, there was even a time I had to be going for what they call womb setting everyday. The journey of TTC is an eye opener to me and had taught me both positive and negative lesson. While a lot will talk bad at your back, they are many who truelly cares and would help me in any way they can to find solution. While I am still believing God on this issue, I pray to God to bless all those who have stood by me, and all this beautiful forums like fertile chick, mamallete and Adorable mum. This group have blessed ne and strengthen my faith.
@ pearl, plz write and talk, you don’t know whose life your story will help.
My Mom, beautiful hearted woman. She made sure I had all the basic essentials and neccessities as a young girl whoms she assumes will grow up to become a ”woman” and ”mother” someday but unfortunately and unknown to her…I gave out those essentials as gifts and present and She never thought she would be living under the same roof with a beard girl.
That was my experience while growing up.
Although, I started school ”early” and was a cheerful, happy girl looking forward to what the future holds but shy and introvert in nature.
My dad on the other hand was liberal and wanted the best for me as well, hence I was a daddy’s girl due to treats and his liberality and the fact that Dad does not always give or roll eyes( ) as a form of discipline rather they talk the talk and thats it; unlike Moms they roll eyes and keep repeating your offence even when they seems to forget or you have forgotten.
I started Mensturation early…I could recollect I had blood stains in my underwear and went straight to my Dad (Daddys girl… ) telling him about the blood stains but unfortunately I got the shock of my life when he reffered me to my mom…then I knew this was something serious…I was quite reluctant about going to my mom but I later did with the help of Dad.
Then she explained to me its normal…You are now a woman…You will be seeing this monthly for the rest of your life except if you are pregnant but DO NOT LET ANY BOY OR MAN TOUCH YOU BECAUSE IT MIGHT LEAD TO PREGNANCY AND THE BLOOD WILL NOT COME AGAIN…(Which to me implies…If you do not have your Menstruation or see blood stains monthly, you cease to be a woman but rather you are a girl).
After the Menarche, I did not see any blood stains nor Mestruate for about three years again although I observed I had some discolourated discharge, odorles which was on and off but due to my playfulness I did not see nor count it as anything serious or important.
However, after finishing Junior Secondary School I told my mum about the challenge and she goes thus who touched me…with whom have I been having sex with…when was the last time I had sex…who disvirgined me…
I could not give any answer to all her question as I was flabberwhelmed and overghasted as to why such questions could have arised.
She told my Dad, Dad defended me and we brushed it aside…all this happened on and off till I was about finishing Senior Secondary School.
NOTE: I was a chronic episodic reactor simply put (Super sensitive) to lots of environmental substance right from preschooler…ranging from dust, fumes, nuts, legumes, trees, perfumes, laughs, emotions, etc
**Life as I know it…**
Mom and Dad came to terms with my Menstrual Challenge and we decided to seek the help of Medical practitioners. Although, that was after lots of Yoyo bitters, Swedish bitters, Agbo(Herbs), Forever Living Products, GNLD products, Trevor, Prayers/Deliverance, and all proved abortive.
The outcome wasn’t in anyway promising as the…”Menstrual challenge was as a result of the side effect of anti-allergy pills, aerosols and Injections I was placed on”. The Doctor said.
Finishing Senior Secondary School and gaining admission immediately into the University was a dream come true because I already made up my mind to be in charge of my life not having to rely on parents nor what the society expects… In short I was ”rebellious” to everyone around me and I still am due to the fact that… ”I don’t respect elders advice”’… like my Dad would say and I ask too many questions.
I was opportuned to seek the help of my family doctor privately and tell him the challenges. And he said…”its will all resolve itself as time goes on but if you are worried get back to me.” Of which I was worried and did got back to him but was reffered to another doctor in Abuja.
Thank God for been curious about my own health and was ready to take the bull by the horn…I didn’t tell my parents but I told couple of friends I will be going to Abuja from Lagos.
I booked my flight (Thanks to Aero Contractors, Most of the crew members knew me those days and I was familiar with them and knew thier names, I sometimes get First class treatment flying economy class while other passegers marvelled and long throat for such treatment… )…Booked an hotel on the central buisness district…Made a deal with a cab man that could pick me up anytime and anywhere…Contacted some friends in Abuja should incase I get missing or die (Not in anyway scared of death but prepared for the worst)…Lastly, Informed both doctors about my where about and time to meet.
Meeting with the doctor was like…Finally, all this will be resolved and over but little did I know that its just the begining of me been a Peripatetic or a Globetrotter.
Was diagnosed with Poly-Follicular aka ”PolyCystic ovary syndrome(PCOS)” and officially placed on birth control pills to help menstruate with a follow up by my family doctor.
Moved on with life, worked with so many organisations both home and abroad, acquired so many skills and knowlegde, had M.Sc, was about going in for Phd…Met with a built tall dark handsome Man.
**Long story short**
Got married asap and everything happened fast knowing whats atstake, I was more worried about him but he was more worried about me. All he wanted was for me to be fine. And from the onset he already made it clear that baby or no baby…we must live our lifes to its fullest potential while achieving all our achievable desires, dreams and fantacies.
However, we both were already seeing a Fertility Specialist before we eventually walked down the aisle.
Two years into our marriage, after three failed Intrauterine insemination (IUI) coupled with been resistant to Almighty Clomid which was the first line of treatment for our fertility treatment( aka Ovulation Induction)… I became a full-grown rebel to my family, friends, and society with my husband been the fuel and supporter due to uprising questions, expectations and pressures.
Fortunately, We have somewhat the same perspective about life; this also had helped us thus far.
We have travelled and moved, changed environment all in the name of trying to concieve and in search for best practices right from the onset but all proven abortive…
We gave in to another procedure, after a good outcome of laparoscopy and hysterosalpingogram called In vitro fertilisation(IVF).
This time around we were so positive that YES!!! This is guaranteed…It will result to a baby 100%…With the way I was responding to the treatment, we went purchasing lots of baby essentials; baby crib, baby strollers, car sits for babies, dolls, books, Infant tub, towels, blankets, rocking chair, changing table, etc but little did we know…Nothing is guaranteed rather we should be hoping for the best.
Our hopes were dashed, one failed IVF lead into another, and another, and another, and another; where we eventually graduated to Intracytoplasmic sperm injection(ICSI) AND Intracytoplasmic morphologically selected sperm injection(IMSI) coupled with joining and voluntering for researches/trials at the EUR, MCH and B***.
Although, I am currently undergoing another cycle of fertility treatment which I am hoping for the best but In all its been over five years of injections upon injections which makes me wonder if this will one day stop as its seems I am getting addicted to fertility treatment.
I really do appreciate platforms like this, which is helping women talk more about various fertility challenges most especially in our clime, how its affects us and how the society percieves us including how to cope and deal with it.
However, I would like to encourage everyone that…IF THERE IS LIFE THERE IS HOPE AND THAT IT IS NOT OVER UNTIL IT IS OVER.
And My Ultimate guide for anyone who is trying to concieve or not and wants the peace/rest of mind:
Detaching yourself from people/societies expectations/cultural beliefs is a great way to live longer when you do or do not have a child.
Note: Some infos were withheld but some questions are welcomed.
**I will also like to add that praying is good, been religious is nice but please caution yourself in dishing out spiritual words or prayers to people because everyone’s got one battle or the other and none of them are folding thier arms, they all are in one way or the other striving/looking for solutions. Encourage them, pray for them in your scared corners but please restrain from been spiritually or religiously dogmatic about life challenges.**
Wishing you all the best in your various endeavours and sending out baby dust to everyone trying to concieve.
@pearl, this is a story of a 💪woman who doesn’t give up, all the best in this TTC phrase. I know victory will come at last for you.
Awwww, Good day Sisters, had to sign in when i read @pearl‘s story. Hugs pearl darling. This will end!!!! Definitely!!!!! And it will end with us having our children !!!!
Same way your period disappeared, mine too went awol and mum started the accusations. She will ask me who is pressing my breast and having sex with me, meanwhile sex was not even on my mind, I got the diagnosis of PCOS while in the university and was told to come back when i was ready to get pregnant.
Its been 4 years and 10 Months of waiting (After making my cohabition legal), 8 Cycles of Clomid which didn’t produce any follicle but made my Vjay feel like Sand paper, 1 cycle of Tamoxifen, 2 IUIS, 1 self medicated IUI, Plenty Bitters, Deliverance and different prayers, anointing oil sent from different persons and 1 IVF.
I am just in a limbo. It has been financially exhausting for us. I just stare into space cos i don’t know what next.
Sisters, it will end in praise. I BELIEVE
@emaimo, This will pass soon. Just keep holding on. As for mother inlaw, i think we share same, the only difference is that she knows i wont take the herbs. I collect and store them then later throw in the dustbin. I have a sweet tooth and so cant even take anything bitter or has a sour taste.
God is preparing you for your testimony.
@pearl, I had tears in my eyes reading your story. Your blessingSSS (meaning :blue:) are surely on the way
@ivuoma, thanks, and yes I believe God will do it for us all.
The lord is our strength
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