Confessions of a Fat Girl 215: Lost Virginity

December 04, 2010

I have a bad habit. When I’m nervous…I eat. And I eat a LOT!

All through the night, thoughts of Legachi’s lost virginity made me so restless, I tossed and turned almost all through. I chided myself for not ending this thing with Ahanna earlier…for not nipping it in the bud. If only I had put my foot down, maybe they wouldn’t have gone so far! When I finally put myself out of my misery, and got out of bed at 5am, I could barely even pray. I was so angry! And I was even angrier with myself for inviting the culprit over for dinner.

“Trust me, you’re doing the right thing.” JJ said to me, later in the morning, as I raved and ranted to him. “We can’t run away from the fact that he and Legachi are involved…perhaps for the long haul. The sooner we accept him, the sooner they stop sneaking around.”

Even I knew my husband was making sense, I wanted to strangle the life out of him. Calling Ogonna for some reinforcement, I was shocked by her own laissez faire attitude.

“Weren’t you the same person shouting when I told you about Legachi and this man she’s dating? How can you be so accepting of the whole thing?” I exclaimed.

“Ihunna, you need to stop boiling! It’s not helping matters. Should we die because Legachi is no longer a virgin? How old were you when you and JJ started doing the thing?! Biko hapu that one!” was her own tart reply. “Legachi is 22. She is old enough to have someone she’s committed to. The guy has even shown that he’s serious. What more do you want?!”

“I don’t understand how you and JJ can be so liberal oh!” I grumbled.

“Because we are not pretenders. And no…nobody is calling you one!” she added, laughing. “You better cook up a nice meal for our in-law oh! Don’t go and disgrace me. Don’t cook any rubbish diet food oh! Cook him some real good Ofe Nsala, and pound some sweet pounded yam mehn!”

“I can see Ifeanyi is making your belle sweet!”

“My dear, life is good…what can I say?!” she giggled, before adding “And don’t go and finish all the bread in the house oh. Because I know you. Eating bread and biscuits anytime you’re under any form of stress!”

I stared at the half-eaten plate of heavily buttered bread on my plate and smiled. Yep, my sister does know me well.

 

The good thing is that she’s in good spirits, which must mean her baby is fine. At that point, it was all the consolation I needed.

“Sis, can I help you?” Legachi asked several times, as I got busy with preps in the kitchen later in the afternoon, but I just waved her off each time. Not that I didn’t need the help…I did. But I wasn’t in the mood to see her face at that point in time. She still felt like such a disappointment to me. I guess in some ways, I’d been in awe of her virginity at that age, and had cherished it maybe almost as much as she’d cherished it herself. And having it taken away felt like a slap in the face to me. But Ogonna was correct. I was being hypocritical. I lost my virginity at a younger age, so I had no moral basis to be judgmental of her.

By about 4pm, I had made a full three-course meal of several salads, including our native one, different types of rice and sauces, and a decadent chocolate cake.

Chai! If only my Trainer and Fitness Buddy, Wonu, could see me now.

With everything done, I set off for the salon to tidy up my weave and get a manicure and pedicure. I might be the older sister bordering on a mother-figure, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t look good.

Driving into my street at about 6:30pm, I cringed at the sight of Ahanna’s 2011 Range Rover already parked in front of my gate.

Na wa oh! They don’t have African time in his village?!

 

 

Catch up on Ihunna’s story here:

  1. Confessions of a Fat Girl 1: Grubbido
  2. Confessions of a Fat Girl 2: Fragile
  3. Confessions of a Fat Girl 3: Defiant
  4. Confessions of a Fat Girl 4: Progress
  5. Confessions of a Fat Girl 5: The Gym
  6. Confessions of a Fat Girl 6: Killjoy
  7. Confessions of a Fat Girl 7: Pain
  8. Confessions of a Fat Girl 8: Frenemies
  9. Confessions of a Fat 9: Exhilarated
  10. Confessions of a Fat Girl 10: Popcorn
  11. Confessions of a Fat Girl 11: Free-Fall
  12. Confessions of a Fat Girl 12: Sunday Morning 
  13. Confessions of a Fat Girl 13: Mission Reactivated
  14. Confessions of a Fat Girl 14: New Things
  15. Confessions of a Fat girl 15: Bad Business
  16. Confessions of a Fat girl 16: Luxury Items
  17. Confessions of a Fat Girl 17: The Solution
  18. Confessions of a Fat Girl 18: Magic Formula
  19. Confessions of a Fat Girl 19: Date Night
  20. Confessions of a Fat Girl 20: Quinoa
  21. Confessions of a Fat Girl 21: Perfect Fit
  22. Confessions of Fat Girl 22: Keeping In Touch
  23. Confessions of Fat Girl 23: Delete
  24. Confessions of a Fat Girl 24: Philosophical
  25. Confessions of a Fat Girl 25: Keep it Moving
  26. Confessions of a Fat Girl 26: My Co-Wife
  27. Confessions of a Fat Girl 27: Old Jeans & Old Friends
  28. Confessions of a Fat Girl 28: Prawn Stir Fry
  29. Confessions of a Fat Girl 29: Facebook Tagging
  30. Confessions of a Fat Girl 30: Detox Part 2
  31. Confessions of a Fat Girl 31: Abs & Crunches
  32. Confessions of a Fat Girl 32: Making Notes
  33. Confessions of a Fat Girl 33: The Christmas Party
  34. Confessions of a Fat Girl 34: Ashiedu
  35. Confessions of a Fat Girl 35: Willpower
  36. Confessions of a Fat Girl 36: Packing…and TV
  37. Confessions of a Fat Girl 37: Last Minute
  38. Confessions of a Fat Girl 38: Body Image
  39. Confessions of a Fat Girl 39: Christmas Trip
  40. Confessions of a Fat Girl 40: Christmas In the Village
  41. Confessions of a Fat Girl 41: Daddy’s Girl
  42. Confessions of a Fat Girl 42: 2010
  43. Confessions of a Fat Girl 43: Uzoamaka
  44. Confessions of a Fat Girl 44: Sugar Binge
  45. Confessions of a Fat Girl 45: The E-mail
  46. Confessions of a Fat Girl 46: She whose name must not be repeated
  47. Confessions of a Fat Girl 47: Smokescreen
  48. Confessions of a Fat Girl 48: Running away
  49. Confessions of a Fat Girl 49: Fry-Up
  50. Confessions of a Fat Girl 50: The Only Solution
  51. Confessions of a Fat Girl 51: The Intervention
  52. Confessions of a Fat Girl 52: Tri-state Sister
  53. Confessions of a Fat Girl 53: Manhattan
  54. Confessions of a Fat Girl 54: Daddy’s Girls
  55. Confessions of a Fat Girl 55: Stunned Silence
  56. Confessions of a Fat Girl 56: Bereavement
  57. Confessions of a Fat Girl 58: Reconciliation
  58. Confessions of a Fat Girl 59: Staying Back
  59. Confessions of a Fat Girl 60: Friends & Marriage Proposals
  60. Confessions of a Fat Girl 61: Colourful and Happy
  61. Confessions of a Fat Girl 62: Sweet Potato and Chicken Salad
  62. Confessions of a Fat Girl 63: Miss Americana
  63. Confessions of a Fat Girl 64: Tragi-Romantic
  64. Confessions of a Fat Girl 65: Dead to me
  65. Confessions of a Fat Girl 66: Love Triangle
  66. Confessions of a Fat Girl 67: Forever my Lady!
  67. Confessions of a Fat Girl 68: Fight to the death
  68. Confessions of a Fat Girl 69: Hard choice to make
  69. Confessions of a Fat Girl 70: Back to reality
  70. Confessions of a Fat Girl 71: Life Reflections
  71. Confessions of a Fat Girl 72: Oatmeal, Blueberries & Banana Pancakes
  72. Confessions of a Fat Girl 73: The Engagement
  73. Confessions of a Fat Girl 74: Pillow Talk
  74. Confessions of a Fat Girl 75: Secretive Sister
  75. Confessions of a Fat Girl 76: Homemade Soup
  76. Confessions of a Fat Girl 77: Nna men!
  77. Confessions of a Fat Girl 78: Comfort Food…Healthy Food
  78. Confessions of a Fat Girl 79: Miracle Working God
  79. Confessions of a Fat Girl 80: Lumps, Bumps and Jiggles
  80. Confessions of a Fat Girl 81: Oyibo Boyfriend
  81. Confessions of a Fat Girl 82: Wedding Gowns
  82. Confessions of a Fat Girl 83: My New Friend 
  83. Confessions of a Fat Girl 84: Emotional versus Physical Hunger
  84. Confessions of a Fat Girl 85: Look like an Mgbeke
  85. Confessions of a Fat Girl 86: Food Cravings
  86. Confessions of a Fat Girl 87: Who am I?
  87. Confessions of a Fat Girl 88: Separation…Counseling…Divorce
  88. Confessions of a Fat Girl 89: A Man’s World
  89. Confessions of a Fat Girl 90: Envy, Weight and Love
  90. Confessions of a Fat Girl 91: Regret
  91. Confessions of a Fat Girl 92: Time to move on
  92. Confessions of a Fat Girl 93: Have some fruit
  93. Confessions of a Fat Girl 94: Family Easter
  94. Confessions of a Fat Girl 95: Sister Reunion
  95. Confessions of a Fat Girl 96: Perfect Fit; Perfect Surprise
  96. Confessions of a Fat Girl 97: The Love Story
  97. Confessions of a Fat Girl 98: Caught in the middle
  98. Confessions of a Fat Girl 99: Kisses…and Blood
  99. Confessions of a Fat Girl 100: Past…or Present Tense
  100. Confessions of a Fat Girl 101: Jewel
  101. Confessions of a Fat Girl 102: “Ill find you…and I’ll kill you”
  102. Confessions of a Fat Girl 103: Homecoming
  103. Confessions of a Fat Girl 104: Fever Pitch
  104. Confessions of a Fat Girl 105: Whodunit!
  105. Confessions of a Fat Girl 106: The Hypocrite
  106. Confessions of a Fat Girl 107: Message from Mom
  107. Confessions of a Fat Girl 108: Accountability and Responsibility
  108. Confessions of a Fat Girl 109: It’s for the best
  109. Confessions of a Fat Girl 110: Port Harcourt
  110. Confessions of a Fat Girl 111: While you were away
  111. Confessions of a Fat Girl 112: Planning…and a little bit of Salmon
  112. Confessions of a Fat Girl 113: Putting yourself first!
  113. Confessions of a Fat Girl 114: Fruit Crumble
  114. Confessions of a Fat Girl 115: Resting Heart Rate
  115. Confessions of a Fat Girl 116: Shishi, he no get!
  116. Confessions of a Fat Girl 117: The truth hurts
  117. Confessions of a Fat Girl 118: Veggie Burger
  118. Confessions of a Fat Girl 119: Weight Watchers Porn
  119. Confessions of a Fat Girl 120: The worst that can happen
  120. Confessions of a Fat Girl 121: Baby Daddy
  121. Confessions o a Fat Girl 122: Not a Player
  122. Confessions of a Fat Girl 123: Fat versus Fit Brain
  123. Confessions of a Fat Girl 124: Aunty Caroline
  124. Confessions of a Fat Girl 125: Delete his number
  125. Confessions of a Fat Girl 126: Meal Planning
  126. Confessions of a Fat Girl 127: Food Shopping
  127. Confessions of a Fat Girl 128: The Baby Bump
  128. Confessions of a Fat Girl 129: Cavorting, Prevention & Spunk
  129. Confessions of a Fat Girl 130: The secret is out
  130. Confessions of a Fat Girl 131: Postpone the inevitable
  131. Confessions of a Fat Girl 132: Queen of Wishful Thinking
  132. Confessions of a Fat Girl 133: Fat Prison
  133. Confessions of a Fat Girl 134: Some time away
  134. Confessions of a Fat Girl 135: Taking life too seriously
  135. Confessions of a Fat Girl 136: Is this really me?
  136. Confessions of a Fat Girl 137: Soothing
  137. Confessions of a Fat Girl 138: Welcome to the Real World
  138. Confessions of a Fat Girl 139: The Storm
  139. Confessions of a Fat Girl 140: Heads Up
  140. Confessions of a Fat Girl 141: Half-Year Check
  141. Confessions of a Fat Girl 142: Leave him for his wife
  142. Confessions of a Fat Girl 143: The Plan
  143. Confessions of a Fat Girl 144: Leave of Absence
  144. Confessions of a Fat Girl 145: A Convenient Life
  145. Confessions of a Fat Girl 146: Sensible Snacking
  146. Confessions of a Fat Girl 147: Choices
  147. Confessions of a Fat Girl 148: Probing Questions
  148. Confessions of a Fat Girl 149: Travel Arrangements
  149. Confessions of a Fat Girl 150: The best feeling ever!
  150. Confessions of a Fat Girl 151: Not happy
  151. Confessions of a Fat Girl 152: Still Married
  152. Confessions of a Fat Girl 153: Heartbreak
  153. Confessions of a Fat Girl 154: You complete me
  154. Confessions of a Fat Girl 155: Make it work
  155. Confessions of a Fat Girl 156: Love Weight
  156. Confessions of a Fat Girl 157: Pretty Girl
  157. Confessions of a Fat Girl 158: Juice Fast Prep
  158. Confessions of a Fat Girl 159: Better this way
  159. Confessions of a Fat Girl 160: Eat the doughnut!
  160. Confessions of a Fat Girl 161: The Stroke
  161. Confessions of a Fat Girl 162: The hardest part
  162. Confessions of a Fat Girl 163: Blame Game
  163. Confessions of a Fat Girl 164: Cerebral Affair
  164. Confessions of a Fat Girl 165: An Epiphany
  165. Confessions of a Fat Girl 166: Regret—Healing
  166. Confessions of a Fat Girl 167: The Old Man’s Talisman
  167. Confessions of a Fat Girl 168: Party in the mouth
  168. Confessions of a Fat Girl 169: The last piece of the puzzle
  169. Confessions of a Fat Girl 170: Ogonna’s Plan
  170. Confessions of a Fat Girl 171: Casual Bystander
  171. Confessions of a Fat Girl 172: My own two eyes
  172. Confessions of a Fat Girl 173: Leading Lady
  173. Confessions of a Fat Girl 174: Longtime Boyfriend
  174. Confessions of a Fat Girl 175: Bone Dry
  175. Confessions of a Fat Girl 176: Divorcing
  176. Confessions of a Fat Girl 177: Looking out for myself
  177. Confessions of a Fat Girl 178: Dispassionate
  178. Confessions of a Fat Girl 179: Making Amends
  179. Confessions of a Fat Girl 180: You showed your hands!
  180. Confessions of a Fat Girl 181: Winter Wonderland
  181. Confessions of a Fat Girl 182: Love conquers all
  182. Confessions of a Fat Girl 183: Business Head
  183. Confessions of a Fat Girl 184: This one won’t hurt
  184. Confessions of a Fat Girl 185: Risqué
  185. Confessions of a Fat Girl 186: Root Canal
  186. Confessions of a Fat Girl 187: No more excuses
  187. Confessions of a Fat Girl 188: Back on the wagon
  188. Confessions of a Fat Girl 189: Big Girls Club
  189. Confessions of a Fat Girl 190: Tired of being pregnant!
  190. Confessions of a Fat Girl 191: Beef Stroganoff
  191. Confessions of a Fat Girl 192: Scared…Excited
  192. Confessions of a Fat Girl 193: An Older Man
  193. Confessions of a Fat Girl 194: Futility
  194. Confessions of a Fat Girl 195: Fluke Pregnancy
  195. Confessions of a Fat Girl 196: Naïve
  196. Confessions of a Fat Girl 197: Nowhere to hide
  197. Confessions of a Fat Girl 198: The Snob
  198. Confessions of a Fat Girl 199: Sweet Freedom
  199. Confessions of a Fat Girl 200: The Bribe
  200. Confessions of a Fat Girl 201: Humour Transplant
  201. Confessions of a Fat Girl 202: The Pressure
  202. Confessions of a Fat Girl 203: Tame the Beast
  203. Confessions of a Fat Girl 204: Underaged Birthday Boo
  204. Confessions of a Fat Girl 205: Blame it on the attitude!
  205. Confessions of a Fat Girl 206: The Gown…The Groom
  206. Confessions of a Fat Girl 207: Aborted Appointment
  207. Confessions of a Fat Girl 208: Sugar Fix
  208. Confessions of a Fat Girl 209: Residual Bleeding
  209. Confessions of a Fat Girl 210: Catching Feelings
  210. Confessions of a Fat Girl 211: Thanksgiving
  211. Confessions of a Fat Girl 212: Wonder Woman
  212. Confessions of a Fat Girl 213: Frenzied
  213. Confessions of a Fat Girl 214: More than words

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